Rabbi's Blog

Throughout the course of our lives, we will meet those who lead and those who follow, those who are loners and those who need to be with others.  One can appreciate an individualistic approach to life and a uniqueness each of these personalities bring to the world while at the same time realizing that those who choose to live and work apart from others may lose out on numerous advantages of connecting with others.. There is a lot to be said about the benefits a person has in any profession or business to have the opportunity to ask questions of colleagues and to not exist alone on an island  bereft of the experience of sharing of information and expertise. An attorney who works for a law firm will have access to sharing ideas and information with other legal minds,  in order to discuss complex or difficult cases. Alternatively  someone who works for and by himself may limit his access to what might be critical information.  

I think of this idea in terms of a Talmudical method of learning called “Klal and Prat” which means the general and the individual. I do not want to discuss the purpose and examples of the Talmudic analysis of Klal/Prat and Klal, but rather to borrow the terminology to more clearly describe two aspects of the role a Jew has within the community. Every Jew has personal and communal responsibilities, and at times these obligations conflict. In most cases the communal obligation overrides the personal one. There are clear situations that Halacha determines what takes precedence over the other, the personal or communal.

Life situations aren’t always black and white. There are abstract or theoretical quandaries in which we find ourselves on a regular basis:  what to do or what not to do vis a vis my needs and those of the greater community. Perhaps we can apply the rules of derech eretz to guide us in what we should or should not do in certain spheres. A few illustrations will make my message clear: I am sitting at my table on Friday night, exhausted from a long week. There is a Shalom Zachor in the community and I am thinking of reasons why I shouldn’t or don’t have to go. Even though I may have good reason not to go, I need to put my own agenda aside to attend a communal simcha. Another derech eretz situation occurs when we have a simcha celebration in Shul. A family sponsors an open invitation lunch, inviting the entire community to join them in their particular simcha.  Too often, people display the audacity to just eat and leave when it suits them, paying no regard to the fact that the meal has not concluded. It is rude to eat and run. Imagine how you would feel if you invited guests  to your home for a Shabbos meal, and as soon as they finish eating everything they wanted to eat they got up and left your Shabbos table and your home without even saying goodbye, Good Shabbos, Thank you or Mazal Tov, excusing themselves with no more than a brief statement that they have to leave. A third and final example (because I can go on and on) is when the Shul/community holds particular communal gatherings that require the people’s participation in order for it to be successful. For example, it is wrong for someone to go to learn in the beis medrash during shalosh seudos, or to learn in the library while a young man gets up to speak on a Yom Tov. Every individual (the prat) needs to put aside his/her own wants, needs, and desires for the better good of the klal and join the tzibbur in whatever it is doing.

B’Rov Am Hadras Melech -  with a multitude of people there lies greater honor to the King. This passuk from Mishlei 14:28 is the ‘positive command’. The flip side, or negative command, is ‘Al Tifrosh Min HaTzibbur’  - do not separate from the community. Rabbeinu Bachya explains the importance and significance of B’Rov Am Hadras Melech, and of course referring to The King, Hashem. A king’s greatness comes from the fact there are a multitude of people supporting him. Every king knows there are people in his kingdom who are smarter, stronger, or even better looking than he. But he, the king, rising above all the different sectors of society and in his land, expands his greatness over everything and everyone else. As soon as people start to leave him and his numbers fall, then he becomes susceptible to the whim of the individuals, and his kingship is threatened. Despite the fact the majority of society may not be behind him, he may still be in power but no longer as the ‘king’. He becomes either a figurehead or a ruler who applies force to rule over the people,  no longer enjoying the willing support of the people towards their king. When  subjects of a land honor their leader, he is truly the king. Lacking that honor, he is viewed as no more than a powerless head or as a despot.

In this week’s Parshas Balak Bamidbar 22:2, the Torah states that Balak ben Tzipor saw all that the Jews did to the Emorites. Only the next verse refers to Balak as king of Moav because the people started to flee,realizing that they could not stand up against the God of the Jews. Balak, after witnessing the destruction of Sichon and Og, lost confidence, no longer viewing himself as a king. Sure there were mighty warriors in his army, but he saw the other mighty nation’s army eradicated and realized he and his army were next.

Balak’s last ditch effort was not to fight physically but rather to attack spiritually. Therefore he summoned and hired the diviner Bilaam to curse the Jews. The only way he could win the physical battle was to first take down the Jews spiritually. The spiritual connection of the Jewish people is the single and collective recognition of Hashem Echad. When we say God is One, it does not only refer to Hashem but also to the Jewish people supporting the King and being there with Him as one. Each individual needs to put aside his/her own individuality for the sake of doing what is in the best interest of the Klal - the group -  even at the expense of something that “I” want to do.

This principle extends to our family and other close relationships that we as human beings must nurture and care for. Life is not about me; it is, rather, about we. The “I” must be set aside,  ready to join the group, ready to give of oneself for the betterment of the whole – the klal. This is the lesson chazal is teaching us regarding how to lead by example for our peers and our children. It may be true that a person has all of the best intentions and good reasons to go off and do something different on his own and not be with the tzibbur, but it is still wrong!           

I promise you in the long run, that you as an individual will benefit more from being part of the tzibbur rather than doing it on your own as the yachid (individual) because through this we are ultimately making ourselves stronger through making the King greater. By participating with the klal we each contribute to the power of the whole, giving recognition and proper respect to our King.

Ah Gut Shabbos

Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky