Rabbi's Blog

With technology improving and medicine advancing, health care for all generations, including the very young and the aging positively increases as well. Over the past fifty years, average life expectancy at birth has increased globally by almost twenty years, from 46.5 years in 1950--1955 to 65.2 years in 2002. This represents a global average increase in life expectancy of four months per year across this time span. In the United States, life expectancy at birth increased by almost nine years between 1960 and 2011. To see three generations today is somewhat common, and we are now witnessing more and more four-generation families. Middle generations numbers two or three face a challenge dealing with their parents and grandchildren. There are a host of challenges which must be faced regarding caring for or attending to the needs of aging parents. We feel guilty because we cannot help enough primarily because we don’t have the time, resources or physical capacity to do the job. At the same time we struggle to allocate adequate time for our parents, we are also bombarded with the privilege and honor of raising our children while dealing with the burden of society’s challenges. This trial is common to many people in the Jewish and non-Jewish world.

One Yom Tov afternoon during lunch, I peered out my window and from the corner of my eye I noticed a parking enforcement vehicle stop by my car. At the time of this event, we had been living in San Diego for only a couple of years. I wondered why the officer was writing me a summons. Quickly, I ran out and assured the officer that I had my Permit B parking sticker. The officer informed me I was being cited for not turning my wheels away from the curb. I was in total shock, and said to her, “I did not know that was a law!” She said, “Did you pass your driver’s test? it’s in the driver’s manual.” Sheepishly, I admitted defeat and said, “O.K., just write the ticket.” She immediately said, “Go ahead and turn them now and I won’t cite you.” I replied, thank you but it’s a holiday and I can’t go into the car.” She then asked me to give her the keys and she’d turn the wheel for me.” Again, I had to tell her, “I can’t do that. Just write the ticket.” She could not believe someone would do such a thing. She tore up the ticket, totally exacerbated.

Parking on public streets and alleys is regulated by the San Diego Municipal Code and the California Vehicle Code. One of the general provisions of law applies to whether there are signs or curb markings present or not. “Wheel cramping is required on all grades over 3% (hills) with or without the presence of signs. Block your wheels diagonally against the curb by turning your wheels into the curb when facing downhill and out to the street when facing uphill.”

The purpose of curbing your car’s wheels is to prevent an accident should the brakes fail. Therefore, if you are headed downhill, turn your front wheels into the curb or toward the side of the road and set the parking brake. Headed uphill, turn your front wheels away from the curb and let your vehicle roll back a few inches. The wheel should gently touch the curb. Then set the parking brake. Headed either uphill or downhill when there is no curb, turn the wheels so the vehicle will roll away from the center of the road if the brakes fail. I thought this was an outdated law given that the brake systems of modern cars are much better and safer today than when the law was instituted. That logic was shattered when I witnessed my neighbor getting a ticket for not curbing his wheels. I questioned the officer and he told me there are instances even today that necessitate the wheels being turned. He told me if a vehicle plows into a parked car, it’s very likely, or at least possible, that the brake could disengage, possibly causing the car to roll into the street. I learned a valuable lesson. Just because Ithink the law should not apply today for reason “X,” it may still be needed for reason “Y” - a probability which I never thought or knew about!

Throughout my teaching and Rabbinic career, I’ve received three basic reactions when discussing certain Mitzvos and our obligations to observe them. The response is either, "The reason no longer applies", “I did not know that” or “That’s ridiculous!” Frequently, the latter reaction is due to a lack of education or belief. It all boils down to more learning of the Torah She’B’Al Peh, the Oral Torah - which compliments and explains the written law. When it comes to Mitzvos, there are two words that describe them: Chukim and Mishpatim. Chukim are the laws that we do not understand; we do not know the reasons which underlie why we observe them. These are commandments that a society creating laws would not come up with. Mishpatim, the namesake of this week’s parsha, are laws that we do understand; we would implement these laws when building a community. There were a few Rishonim* who enumerated the six hundred thirteen commandments from within the fifty-four parshios of the Torah. These Rishonim do not agree on the actual place in the Torah from where each Mitzva is derived or learned. Ramba”m lists Mishpatim tied fourth with the most Mitzvos in any one parsha, while the sefer HaChinuch** lists Mishpatim as the parsha with the fourth most Mitzvos. Some Mitzvos are difficult or challenging to decipher as to whether the Mitzva is a Chok or a Mishpat. Clearly there are certain situations where a Mitzva can beinterpreted to be both between man and man or man and God, depending upon the situation.

In this week’s Parshas Mishpatim we learn of at least one Mitzva that can have multiple meanings and connotations. In Shmos 21:2 the Torah states: “Lo Tihyeh Acharei Rabim L’Raos, V’Lo Ta’Aneh Al Riv Lintos, Acharei Rabim L’Hatos”. “Do not follow the majority to do evil, do not speak up in a trial to pervert justice, a case must be decided based upon the majority.” It is obvious that we should not follow anyone who is doing evil. It is also obvious in cases of law that we decide according to the majority. In questions of Halachik uncertainty, the Rabbi’s derive “to follow the majority” from this concept. For example, if an unidentifiable piece of meat is found in the market where there are ten butcher shops, nine kosher and one non-kosher, the meat is deemed kosher. But if nine out of ten were treif and one kosher the meat can not be eaten.

Reb Elchonon Wasserman ZT”L (1874-1941) writes in his sefer Kovetz HeAros about a famous exchange between Reb Yonason Eybeshutz (1690-1764) and one of the wisest Gentile scholars. The gentile challenged the Rabbi as follows: “It states in your Torah to follow the majority, and your nation is the fewest in number of all the nations of the world. Given this fact, why don’t you and your people follow our beliefs?” Reb Yonason answered, “The rule and law of following the majority is only applicable in areas of doubt; it is not applicable when we are sure of something. In the case of the meat, if the piece of meat was discernible and we knew that it was not kosher, we don’t say it is kosher because nine out of ten stores only sold kosher meat. Rather, in that situation the meat is still not good and not kosher.” So too with the Jewish people and our belief in Hashem. We do not have any doubts as to our belief about Hashem and the Torah and all the principles that go along with these beliefs. Despite the other nations of the world making up the majority of the population, we are sure of what we know; we are sure of our beliefs. Therefore, the majority rule does not apply to us in this situation. The Chasam Sofer adds if there is logic, if there are plausible arguments, then we follow the majority. If the issues discussed can be seen from both sides of the argument, then we follow the majority. However, an issue that is as clear as the sun will rise in the east and set in the west, no matter how many people emphatically state the opposite, we do not follow them. We know Hashem and His Torah is EMES/ truth. This is no question to be discussed in a rational scientific, logical manner.

Many Jews in the world are uneducated, lacking a well-rounded, solid Jewish education. Unfortunately, this leads such a person to join most people who challenge and don’t follow the Torah. It behooves every Jew to thoroughly learn the Torah, to see for himself or herself the absolute truth and follow the minority in the face of the majority. My hope and prayer is for every Jew to become educated in Torah and not to use ignorance as an excuse for not following the Torah and do Mitzvos. Equally important is to keep in mind if we think the reason for the Mitzva no longer applies......think again

*Rishonim "the first ones" were the leading rabbis and poskim, who lived approximately during the 11th to 15th centuries during the era before the writing of the Shulchan Aruch "Set Table", a common printed code of Jewish law, 1563 CE and following the Geonim (589-1038 CE). Rabbinic scholars after the Shulkhan Arukhare generally known as acharonim ("the latter ones").

**The sixteenth century author Gedalya Ben Yichyeh credited the Sefer ha-Chinuch to Rabbi Aharon HaLevi of Barcelona (1235-c. 1290), a Talmudic scholar and halachist.Others disagree, as the views of the Chinuch contradict opinions held by HaLevi in other works. This has led to the conclusion that the true author to Sefer HaChinuch was a different Reb Aharon Halevi, a student of the Rashba, rather than his colleague. Though there is a debate about who is the true author, it is agreed that the Sefer HaChinuch was written by a father to his son, upon reaching the age of Bar Mitzvah.

Update this content.

This Dvar Torah is L'Ilui Nishmas in memory of Esther Rochel Bas Nachum, Rose Bogopulsky A"H, on her Yahrzeit 11th of Shvat

One need not look far for inspiration; sometimes it’s right there in front of us. There are some amazing people whom we see every day, but take a moment to just think how amazing they are. We think we need to hear great stories and share incredible moments to be inspired by people and the things they do. Take the time to look around. You man notice a neighbor, a co-worker, or a relative who has done something awesome - and they do it every day. A short example is being so impressed, so awe struck when someone donates a kidney. Lo and behold I have a cousin whose own son gave him a kidney. One might say, “Oh, for a relative this isn’t so impressive; who wouldn’t do that?” Well, let me tell you, from my perspective it’s a very big deal.

Closer to home, I have come to not only respect but rather be impressed by a man who lives in the Shul apartments. Mr. Timothy King, who prefers to be called Tim, is African American (I obtained his permission to write about him) and has been living here for about three years. Whenever I see him, I say hello and we chat for a few minutes, usually about the current sports of the day. Unfortunately, he still smokes and needs to light up off Shul grounds, so I usually catch him in the parking lot either on the way towards the gate or back to his apartment. One day, he was struggling up a tiny incline in the parking lot. I immediately went over and asked him if he needed some help. “No, no,” he said, “I’m o.k. I just need to get a little exercise.” You see, Tim was born with some deformities: no legs, one healthy arm, and the other only a stump. I always see him in his motorized wheelchair, but that day he was using an ordinary wheelchair. He was wheeling and pushing himself with his one healthy arm, but it was a gruesome struggle. I asked him if he needed help being pushed, and if something had happened to his motorized chair. He answered in the negative to both questions. His motorized chair was working, and he did not need help (although he appreciated the offer) because this is the way he is able to exercise. Being very limited in his capacity to exercise, wheeling himself gets his heart pumping and his blood flowing. He needed to push, and it was not easy for him, nor was it easy for me to watch. The sheer determination and resolve to do it on his own was humbling. There is no question the strength of character and mind is what gives him the will to literally push forward. He is always on the move and is driven by his purpose. Tim knows the only way for him to survive is to continue to work hard, to push forward and not allow anything stop him from living.

The challenges, walls, and barriers that Hashem places in front of people are the daily tests we must face and go through in life. The success or failure, more often than not, lies in our determination and resolve to push on and tackle the encounters as they come. This is clearly seen in the Torah as the Jewish people, finally set free by Pharoah, look behind them and see Pharoah’s army chasing them. Staring in front of them is the Sea of Reeds. With no place to go, the Jews question Moshe by saying, “Weren’t there enough graves in Egypt? Why did we need to come here to die? Moshe replies, stating usual, “Don’t worry. God will rescue you today.” And so what did they do? Read on…..

In this week’s Parshas B’Shalach The Torah states in Shmos 14:15: “Vayomer Hashem El Moshe Mah Titzok Eilay, Dabeir El Bnei Yirael V’Yisaoo”. God said to Moshe,”Why are you crying out to Me? Speak to the Israelites and let them start moving.” Apparently, as Moshe lifted his staff in order to split the sea, all the people froze in place except Nachshon Ben Aminadav. The time was now. Already in the water up to his neck at that split second when Moshe was getting ready to split the sea, Nachshon Ben Aminadav continued to move forward as the sea split. What was it that actually made the Yam Suf split? Was it Moshe and his staff or Nachshon’s determination, Emunah, and Bitachon in Hashem that something will happen, allowing him and the people to follow to safety? The Gemorah Sotah 37a tells us that each tribe was unwilling to enter the water first. One tribe said, “I will not be the first to descend into the sea,” while another tribe declared, “I will not be the first to descend.” At that point Nachshon, son of Aminadav, the prince of the tribe of Yehuda, leaped forward, descending first into the sea. The Midrash Rabbah in Bamidbar 13:7 explains, ‘Why was he called Nachshon, because he was the first to go down into the surf (in Hebrew Nachshol) of the Red Sea. Therefore, God told Moshe, “He who sanctified My Name in the sea will be the first to bring his offering in the dedication of the altar.’”

At that precise moment Moshe was praying at length. Hashem then said to Moshe, “My dear ones are drowning in the sea while you linger in prayer with me?” Moshe said before God: “Master of the Universe, but what is it in my power to do?” God responded: “Speak to the children of Israel and let them journey forth.” Reviewing this story, we can ask ourselves: was it the fact that Moshe prayed and lifted up his staff that split the sea, or did it split because the Jews walked through and caused the sea to split? The answer is, it was Nachshon’s initiative to start the process and force Moshe’s hand to daven to Hashem and get the people behind to go in as well. Nachshon was able to lead because he dared to go into a place where men don’t usually go. What was it that gave Nachshon the fortitude to do what he did? It was his Emuna and Bitachon the faith and security in the Almighty that this is the path he must lead on.

It is easy to say I have Emunah (faith) and Bitachon (trust), but it is something totally different to live and act with complete Emunah and Bitachon, especially when the pressure is on. Having Emunah and Bitachon isn’t something we are just born with; it develops over time by learning and reading about it, by listening to and reading stories of great people who live and breathe entirely through faith and security from God. By doing so we will strengthen ourselves, providing us with the fortitude to take the lead and go places that otherwise we would never go. Let us all learn from Nachshon ben Aminadav and Tim King to take a leading role for the Jewish community and push forward in the continued success of building Beth Jacob Congregation and ultimately the House of Yakov Avinu.

This Dvar Torah is sponsored by Rand and Nomie Levin in memory of Rand's father Aryeh Leib Ben Yisrael HaLevi on his Yahrzeit.

This Dvar Torah should be a zchus for a Refuah Sheleima L’Chol Cholei Yisrael 

‘Tis the season when many people get sick. Over the past few weeks there hasn’t been a household where at least one member was not sick from the usual winter ailments. At that point, it doesn’t take much for the cough, cold, or influenza to sweep through the house and systematically take on every member. Parents have expressed to me that their only hope is that once it made its rounds it will leave and the cycle won’t start again, hitting the family a second time. During these “light” kinds of sicknesses everyone in the family may go through a little inconvenience. Maybe a child sharing a room will have to sleep someplace else to avoid catching something from the sick sibling. Perhaps a parent will have to administer medication, prepare a special diet for the time being, and even take off from work. Generally speaking, the inconveniences and small changes are tolerable and don’t create long-term effects on any one as this is part of the usual sicknesses with which families must contend. We often wish a person a speedy recovery or refuah sheleimah which is loosely translated as have a “complete healing”. Whether it means to quickly get better or to have a complete recovery, the main point is to wish the individual better health. I would like to suggest another definition of refuah sheleimah.  

If I may at this point, speak/write about a very sensitive and critical set of circumstances that Jewish families are facing. Many of societal issues that directly impact the Jewish family crosses over to all segments of the Jewish world, whether chasidish, litvish, yeshivish, modern orthodox, and, I would presume to a degree, even conservative and reform Judaism. I am writing this piece to bring an awareness of how devastating illness can be that it wreaks havoc not only on the patient but on the entire the family as well. I write with trepidation in mentioning the hardships families must endure when a family member is facing a life or death illness R”L (Rachmana Litzlan - may God save us) and or undergoing treatments that will hopefully provide extended life. But an even greater challenge to a family is when one member is challenged with a severe psychological disorder. Mental health issues are not only paralyzing for the patient; they are also debilitating for the other children, parents and even the grandparents. There are some subtle and some non-subtle effects on a family that manifest itself differently to each family member.

Dealing with mental health issues raises stress levels to their limits. When children are stressed out, they may act out in school or fall behind in their work;  their minds are pre-occupied with many crucial, potentially life-altering changes around them. Older children, adults, parents and even grandparents may become more irritable and have less patience for others. These behaviors may be interpreted as obnoxious, but in truth it’s the ancillary effects of the disorder attacking their loved one. Parents and spouses of a child with a mental disorder may have stains on their personal and intimate relationships. Many of the primary and essential important goals and values they’ve built up over the years seem to be shaky at best and crumbling at worst. This is where the Refuah and its co-part  Sheleimah come into play. Refuah/healing must be addressed to the patient. There is no question a complete and full (shaleim) recovery is wished for. But let us not forget that the Sheleimah component is addressed to the relatives of the patient. The idea and concept of Sheleimah is discussed in the past and coming week’s parshiot.

In this week’s Parsha Vayechi we are introduced to illness/sickness for the very first time. The Torah states in Bereishis 48:1 “VaYehi Acharei HaDevarim HaEileh, Vayomer L’Yosef Hinei Avicha Choleh, Vayikach Es Shnei Banav Imo Es Menashe V’Es Ephrayim”. “A short time after this, Joseph was told that his father was sick; Joseph went to his father, taking his two sons Menashe and Ephrayim with him.”  The Midrash Rabbah chapter 65 teaches us from the beginning of Bereishis until now the word Choli/Sick is not mentioned. It was Yaakov Avinu who asked Hashem to bring illness to the world instead of someone just dying. Yaakov had to ask Hashem as a show of mercy to bring illness so that a person could put his affairs in order. Primarily, if a person dies suddenly, he will not be at peace without first having the opportunity to make proper  arrangements among his children. Therefore, if a person has at least a few days prior to dying, he can have Yishuv HaDaas, a settling of his mind surrounding his children. Hashem agreed to Yaakov’s suggestion and declared He would start with Yaakov.  Yaakov was therefore the first one to become sick.

The root of the word Sheleimah is Shin, Lamed, Mem, which spells out shalom  - peace  - or Shaleim - complete. Even though Yaakov was sick and dying, the words wished upon him were Refuah Sheleimah, which could be interpreted as he should die while still being whole and complete. Blessing his children, giving them ultimate direction for life, put Yaakov’s mind at ease, allowing him to leave this world ‘whole’.

In last week’s parshas Vayigash we got a glimpse into the completeness or fullness of the wishes. In Bereishis 45:27 the Torah states: “Vayidabru Eilav Eis Kal Divrei Yosef Asher Diber Aleihem, Vayar Es Ha’Agalos Asher Shalach Yosef Laseis Oso VaTechi Ruach Yaakov Avihem”. “Then the brothers related all the words that Joseph had spoken to them, and he saw the wagons that Joseph had sent to transport him. The spirit of their father Yaakov was then revived”. Yaakov was emotionally sick over the discord that existed among his sons. Having now heard directly from his sons the entire episode and its conclusion, he felt relieved. Yaakov never fully accepted the notion that Yosef was actually dead. He knew Yosef wasn’t physically dead, but still suffered an emotional death due to being isolated from the rest of the family. For twenty-two years Yaakov felt his family was broken, fractured by the disdain shown by the brothers towards Yosef. With the brothers realizing Yosef’s true intentions, they were able to look back and reconsider their breaking apart the family by selling Yosef. As Yaakov saw the wagons, it reminded him of the last thing he learned with Yosef:  the laws of Eglah Arufa. The Mitzva of Egla Arufa is when a person is found murdered between two cities. God lays the blame on the Rabbis of the closest city because they must have not provided a place to sleep and the man was forced to travel. A ceremony of decapitating a calf, an Eigel was done by a brook of water and a patch of non-tilled land. Without going into the details Yosef sent wagons  (also called agalot ), same word as calf.  This was an additional sign to Yaakov that the sons who sold Yosef held themselves accountable for their actions. The spirit that is now revived within Yaakov is the feeling of Shleimus, having his family whole once again.

We see the importance of the family holding on together and as they struggle with illness and sickness within the family they should also be the recipients of the well-wishers of a Refuah Shelimah to the patient and the entire family. We hope and pray for the Refuah / healing to the ill patient and a Sheleima to the bringing back of wholesomeness to the extended family.                    

Ah Gut Shabbos

Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky

A few weeks ago, I was in the check-out line  at Ralphs,  kibitzing with the cashier.  I happen to know most of the older cashiers, having shopped there many years. Many service people wear name tags, and at that moment the cashier at Ralphs was looking for hers. As she was looking, I thought to myself, ‘who’s to know  that these are their real names; maybe they just wear fake names’. She then explained that she was looking for her spare name tag, explaining  that they usually have a few of them. I then said to her, ”Why don’t you just take someone else’s name tag?” (Are the customers going to know the difference?) She then replied, “I don’t want to be anybody else; I want to be me!”

I found her response to be extraordinarily deep on many levels.  In society, and particularly with regard to children, there is an emphasis through Hollywood and sports to become someone whom we are not. Children grow up idolizing others and tend to be harmed by it if they don’t grow out of it by the time they are teenagers. It is critical for parents to encourage their children to be themselves. People do better in life when things are real,  not fake. Living in San Diego in a warm climate creates an environment which  downplays the non-Jewish holidays. I was reminded of this recently while visiting the East Coast, seeing the outlandish displays of lights and holiday paraphernalia strewn over trees, houses, and lawns. These are for the most part intelligent, bright, successful people who year after year continue to live a life and celebrate with things they know are made up and false. To make matters worse, they continue with this façade, transmitting it to their children as if it were true. I wonder when and what the reaction of children is when they realize it is all made up? Perhaps some realize this and re-evaluate religion while others may live their entire lives knowing the truth but living a lie.

Putting religion aside, living a life that we don’t believe in could be very painful and sorrowful. More importantly, this situation also applies to the potential that a person is capable of reaching in life yet chooses not to. If one looks at great, successful, righteous people, we typically reason that they reached their potential because they had it within them to do so, while the wicked villains of history did not. The fact is that every evil leader, tyrant, or wicked ruler had the potential to use their strengths for good but chose not to. We see this with two great leaders from the Torah, specifically two men who really had the same potential: Yaakov and his twin brother Eisav.

It is this in week’s Parsha Vayeishev that we don’t hear about Yakov and Eisav together until the end of Sefer Bereishis. From the time they were conceived, we read about them in every Parsha and now take a break until they are re-united in death. The meeting and parting in last week’s parsha reveals a great deal about the potential personality of Eisav. In Bereishis 33:4 the Torah states: “Vayaratz Eisav Likraso Vayichabkeihu, VaYipole Al Tzavarav VaYishakeihu, VaYivku”. And Esau ran to greet Yakov and he hugged him, and he fell on his neck and he kissed him, and they cried. Most commentators explain the unique dots placed over the word ‘and he kissed him’. Last week I heard Rabbi Asher Brander quoting the Netzi’v (Rav Naphtali Zvi Yehuda Berlin) in his commentary Haamek Davar. The Netzi’v explains the implication of why both Eisav and Yakov cried. The fact that both Eisav and Yakov cried comes to teach us that not only did Eisav have an excitement about meeting with Yakov, but Yakov also had his feelings of love for his brother aroused as well. Not only was Eisav trying to show a love for Yakov, but Yakov cried out of love for his brother Eisav. The love which Yakov cried over was for the physical emotion that he had for his twin brother. More importantly, Yakov cried over an emotional and intellectual reason…. the potential of his brother. There is no question that Yakov and Eisav, despite being twins, had stark differences between them - Yakov sat and learned while Eisav hunted. Yakov used his mind for intellectual pursuits while Eisav chose to use his body for physical pursuits. Yakov used his intellectual capacity to do good, while Eisav used his physical capacity to do evil. Yakov cried because Eisav potentially could have used his physical ability to also do good. Perhaps Eisav himself realized and appreciated Yakov for whom and what he represented but could not live that lifestyle. Rather, he chose to be someone else,  to use his strengths for evil and not for good. He too cries over his own potential,  bemoaning the fact he didn’t develop properly, using his body and not his mind.

The Netzi’v continues, using this as a spring board for all future generations. When the children and offspring of Eisav have a pure, spiritual awakening to recognize the greatness of the Jewish people, then we, the Jewish people, will in turn have strong brotherly feelings toward Eisav, because he is our brother. The great Rebbi Yehuda HaNasi demonstrated this love towards Antoninus (a Roman leader descended from Eisav) as he acknowledged the greatness of Hashem and the Jewish people. Ironically, at the end of Eisav’s life, in a remarkable turn of events, he shows that it is the intellect and knowledge of Hashem and Torah which should have been the way he lived his life. Fast forward to the end of Bereishis in Parshas Vayechi -  after Yakov dies he is brought to the MeAras Hamachpela for burial. Eisav shows up and claims Yakov buried Leah there and used up his spot, therefore the remaining grave should belong to him, Eisav. An argument ensues between Yakov’s children and Eisav, and need for Naphtali (who is swift) to quickly go back to Egypt and retrieve the deed and proof of purchase that Yakov would have the remaining spot. Chushim, the son of Dan, who was deaf, didn’t understand what the confusion was and concluded that Eisav was holding up the burial of his grandfather. At that, Chushim pulled out a sword and cut off Eisav’s head and it rolled into the cave, coming to rest at Yakov’s feet.

Yakov and Eisav re-united, born as twins and buried close to each other, but at the end it was only the intellectual part of Eisav, his head, that showed his regret for living a life of futility and coming to the realization a bit late, but nevertheless showing us where his head wanted to be. That is why Yakov cried over and for him. Let us recognize who we are now and not regret becoming someone else. This illustrates one of the major lessons we take from Chanukah as some Jews became Misyavnim, like the Greeks, not remaining who they were and who they could have grown to become.

Ah Gut Shabbos

Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky

The beginning of my Rabbinic career was put on hold due to the fact I could not find a pulpit that suited me and my family. There were a few opportunities but some of the places that wanted me I did not want, and a few places that I wanted did not want me! Because both my wife and I were both raised in New York in predominantly religious neighborhoods, we decided to take teaching positions in a small, out-of-town community which could benefit from what we had to offer.

 We taught Judaic studies from grades three to eight. I taught third grade Chumash, specifically the book of Bereishis. Bereishis, like the other four books of the Torah, have other names, in this case the first book is also known as Sefer Ha’Avos - the Book of the Fathers. We began with Lech L’Cha and discussed the patriarchs and matriarchs of the Jewish people. I taught them that our forefathers were Avraham, Yitzchok and Yakov while our foremothers were Sarah, Rivka, Rochel and Leah. One of my innocent third grade eight-year-old students piped up and asked the following question: ”Why are the patriarchs called the ‘four fathers’ when there are only three of them?” I must have repeated myself a hundred times, but this child refused to accept and understand the difference between the forefathers and the four fathers. Just as he finally gave in, we discussed the matriarchs and then again, he piped up and said, “You see, we call them the foremothers because there are four of them!” At that point I just felt defeated and gave up and said, “Fine. You can call them the threefathers.”

In reality, we don’t usually see the matriarchs referred to as the foremothers. The reason is obvious. Bilhah and Zilpah were the mothers of four of the twelve tribes. The formation of the Jewish people was not limited to the main wives of Avraham, Yitzchok and Yakov but included their maid servants who were given to Yakov by Lavan. In this week’s Parsha Vayeitzay after Rochel realized she could not conceive, the passuk states in Bereishis 30:4: “VaTiten Lo Es Bilhah Shifchasa L’Isha, Vayavo Eileha Yakov”: “She (Rochel) gave him her handmaid Bilhah as a wife, and Jacob came to her.” A few verses later in 30:9 a similar situation occurs with Leah giving Zilpah, her maidservant,  to Yakov as a wife, and she, too, has two children, like Bilhah. Despite the explanation that there were more than four mothers responsible for the creation of the nation, we don’t automatically consider Bilhah and Zilpah as part of the matriarch coalition as evidenced by the sons of Leah considering their children second class.

I would like to share an idea of why we don’t view the total group as the foremothers. At the end of this week’s Parsha, we witness a disparity between Rochel and Leah to their mother-in-law Rivka and great-mother-in-law, Sarah. Sorah felt the situation with Yishmael in the house was not good for her son Yitzchok. She asked her husband Avraham to send Yishmael and his mother away. Avraham is reluctant and only acquiesces to his wife’s request after God tells Avraham in 21:12: ‘Kal Asher Tomar Eilecha Sorah, Shma B’Kolah’: ‘Do everything that Sarah tells you.’ Bottom line -  Arvraham, to listen to your wife! At the end of Parshas Toldos, Rivka advises and urges Yakov to flee until his brother Eisav calms down from wanting to kill him after taking the brachos.  Now, it is no secret that Yitzchok loved both Eisav and Yakov. We don’t hear Yitzchok objecting to Rivka’s sending Yakov away. Apparently, Yitzchok realizes that his wife is correct in assessing the situation, even though it would lead to Yitzchok not seeing his son for twenty-two years. As painful as that reality would become, in hindsight Yitzchok listened to his wife and followed through regarding any decision she made for the family. This was in stark difference when compared to Sorah and Rivka and Rochel and Leah. As the situation between Yakov and his father-in-law, Lavan, continued to sour, Yakov decides it’s time to leave. In Bereishis 31:4-7 it states: “Vayishlach Yaakov VaYikra L’Rachel U’L’Leah. VaYomer Lahen Ro’eh Anochi Es Pnei Avichen Ki Einenu Kitmol Shilshome. V’Ateina Y’Daten, Ki B’Kol Kochi Avaditi Es Avichen. VaAvichen Haseil Bi.” - “Yakov sent word and summoned Rachel and Leah to the field where his flock was.  ‘I saw your father’s face’, he said. ‘He is not acting the same with me as he used to. But the God of my father has been with me. “You know full well that I served your father with all my strength. Your father swindled me and changed his mind about my pay at least ten times.”Why is it necessary for Yakov to continue a diatribe about Lavan, his father-in-law, and how poorly he was treated? The answer is that he had no choice but to go on and explain himself.

Right from the start Yakov tells his wives about how their father has changed. He explained that Yakov is now wicked and an enemy, and that surely, we should flee. His wives remained silent, and therefore Yakov said to them: ‘you know full when and he swindled me,’  but Rochel and Leah did not respond to Yakov’s pleas to leave. They maintained an indifference regarding leaving or staying. Each time Yakov described how Lavan tried to dupe him, he told them about the miracles which occurred, showing how Hashem was there to protect him.. After all these descriptions of offenses and miracles fail and still they don’t take the hint that the family needs to move, Yakov reminds them about his vow that if Hashem protects him, he will leave this land and return to Eretz Yisrael. The Gemara in Nedarim says if a man does not fulfill his vows then the wife of the man dies. Immediately, when they heard about the Neder (vow) found in 31:14 Rochel and Leah answered,  basically acquiescing that would be the time to leave their father’s house and take the family back to Eretz Yisrael.

I would suggest that Rochel and Leah were still under the influence of their father Lavan and could not see what was beneficial for the family. Yakov waited and waited for his wives to act like Sorah and Rivka, taking family matters into their hands, telling to their husband to leave. But this kind of bravery was delayed and stunted while in Lavan’s house. It would only be when they finally leave that they would fill the shoes of Rivka and Sorah. Rashi points out to Yakov that in this place of Lavan’s house he could not have God’s presence;  it will only happen in Eretz Yisrael. If Yakov didn’t have the Shechina, neither did Rochel and Leah.  This is why they didn’t understand the need to leave.    

It is not ‘father knows best’ or ‘mother knows best’, rather it’s the one who has the Shechina resting upon himself or herself who knows best!

Ah Gut Shabbos

Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky

Ever hear of Cerumen Impaction? Well, you may not have heard of it even if you have it, because it affects your hearing! This impaction takes place in the ear canal which produces a waxy oil called cerumen, more commonly known as earwax. . When you clean your ears, you can accidentally push the wax deeper, causing a blockage. Wax buildup is a common reason for temporary hearing loss.

Earwax is a yellowish, waxy material that is produced by the sebaceous gland in the ear canal inside the ear. It lubricates, cleans, and protects the lining of the ear canal by repelling water, trapping dirt, and making sure insects, fungi, and bacteria do not get through and harm the eardrum. Earwax consists mainly of shed layers of skin. It’s slightly acidic and has antibacterial properties. Without earwax, the ear canal would become extremely dry, waterlogged, and infected.

As with most things in life, too little or even too much of a good thing can be harmful. I am the one who falls into the category of having too much or too little of something good, in this case it’s too much. An excessive accumulation of earwax, especially when it is impacted, can lead to a blocked ear. I’ve had this condition before and, so I knew immediately when it occurred. I rubbed my ear and before I knew it I felt this subtle change very much like being underwater or inside an airplane. A blocked ear can be painful and can affect hearing. In my case it didn’t hurt, but I had difficulty in hearing. When earwax build-up hardens and blocks the ear canal, it forms a plug, or blockage. An ear that is blocked due to earwax may lead to a host of other issues and conditions (See Below). My discomfort came into play by fidgeting with my ear lobe trying to dislodge the wax. I didn’t want to tell people about it, therefore when I was speaking to someone (particularly during Kiddush) I turned slightly sideways so that my healthy ear was angled directly in front of the speaker. I can only imagine the life of people who have permanent hearing loss and the challenges they must go through.

Through this short ordeal I came to appreciate the difference between two seemingly similar but in actuality, very different words: hearing and listening. Those who have no hearing impairment can sometimes get by just by hearing without actually listening. A person who has to cope with any level of hearing impairment, on the other hand, must listen, focus, intensely, must concentrate fully in order to process what he is struggling to hear. Parenthetically, this idea may be applied to many areas of life. When we ae healthy we can get by without putting in one hundred percent effort, but if we are handicapped in any capacity, much effort needs to be spent to make up for that which we are missing. This notion is clearly evident throughout the Torah, but acutely so in this week’s reading.

In this week’s parsha Chayei Sorah, from 23:6 through 23:16 the words “to hear” or “to listen” are said no less than six times. The word ‘Shma’ is loosely translated as ‘hear,’ as in Shma Yirael - Hear O’ Israel. In this section the word ‘Sh’mauni’, translated as ‘listen,’ is used over and over again by Avraham when speaking to the children of Ches. In Bereishis 23:8 the Torah states: “Vayedaber Itam Laymor, Im Yeish Es Nafshechem Likbor Es Meisi Milfanai, Sh’mauni, Ufigu Li B’Ephron Ben Tzchar”: He (Avraham) spoke to them (Children of Cheis) and said, ‘If you really want to help me bury my dead and [put her out of] my presence, listen to me, and speak up for me, to Ephron, the son of Tzohar”. Avraham is not telling them ‘hear’ what he has to say but rather ‘listen’ to what I have to say. The connotation of the word hear conveys the message that the person being spoken to is only interested in the speaker in order to politely ‘hear’ him out. ”Hearing” another person’s spoken words requires no processing, no genuine input or output. The act of hearing only requires recognition of words at face value. On the other hand, the word ‘listen’ connotes not only hearing but processing, synthesizing the statement as well. Merely hearing someone speak does not have anything to do with understanding; “listening” is active, demanding that the listener pay attention to what is being said. And it leads directly to valuing the active follow-through of the listener to process the speaker’s words. This interpretation is brought out by Rav Yakov Tzvi Mecklenburg in his sefer HaKesav V’Hakabbalah. He uses the Targum Onkelos to understand and appreciate what the word listen means. Targum translates the word ‘Sh’mauni’ as Kabilu Mini - accept it from me. Avraham tells the people to” accept the story from me, believe me”, to “stick up for me against Ephron”. Avraham is asking the people to listen to him and to follow him so that he, Avraham, will acquire the Meoras HaMachpeilah, enabling him to bury Sorah. There is an extra word -‘Loo’ - used as a plea from Avraham, asking a favor from the people to listen to him, to believe him!

The word Shma - to hear- is passive; the word Sh’Mauni – listen - is active. How often it is after a parent speaks to a child, or a teacher to a student or the Rabbi to a congregant that the recipient responds to the speaker ‘I heard you already’ but then the speaker repeats it and says, “You may have heard it, but you are not listening to me.” There ae many things we hear in life, but they don’t penetrate, and we don’t end up listening to important, vital information. When the ear is clogged we hear stuff, but it takes greater effort to listen to the physical sound. We need to clean out our ears, remove the blockage so that when we hear the message we will understand it and listen closely, clearly to what it is saying to us.

Ah Gut Shabbos

Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky

*Earache, Ear infection, Itchiness, Ringing in the ears, known as tinnitus,

A feeling of fullness in the ear

Vertigo, which is a sensation of loss of balance

Cough, due to nerve stimulation from the inside of the ear when pressure in the area is increased.

Most hearing-aid faults are believed to be caused by an excessive buildup of earwax.

This Dvar Torah is L’Ilui Nishmat Mr. Al Adatto, Reb Avraham Ben Yitzchak and Luna Adatto Z”L on his 11th Yahrzeit, the 6th of Cheshvan.

Food is perhaps the only universal thing that really has the power to bring everyone together. No matter what the culture, people everywhere around the world get together to eat. I can’t speak for other religions or people, but this truism surely applies to Jews. The Jewish menu not only fuels our stomachs, it directly impacts the time of year we eat certain foods and the regions of the world from which our ancestors emigrated. Every week we look forward to eating specific foods that grace our Shabbos table. I think Jews are different than any other religion or people because throughout our history despite our centuries of exile, escaping from one country, seeking refuge in another, each region differing culturally and gastronomically, our adherence to the Mitzvos, whether Ashkenaz or Sephard, remains the same. The fact that Jewish customs and practices bear the histories of these various regions, cultures and languages of our dispersion, reflected clearly in an enormously rich collection of treasured recipes complemented by our ever-expanding taste buds sets up a clear analogy to observance of the Mitzvos. While we all customarily eat the same kinds of foods –wine, challah, meat, fish, and so on - these foods are prepared differently, depending upon the regions of the world from which our ancestors once resided.

The Shabbos table is decked with many foods that have reason to be eaten on Shabbos. The eating of fish and meat is something people try to eat at all three Shabbos meals. Wine is a staple - we make Kiddush for the meals. Usually, people will have a soup on Friday night and a cholent for Shabbos lunch. Culturally, we may be different, but the source of the kinds of foods is traditional. Ashkenazim eat gefilte fish while Sepharadim prefer other kinds of fish such as a spicy salmon. Chicken soup may be a staple for me – it is, by the way, the soup of choice among Ashkenazim - it also happens to be a favorite soup of virtually every region of the world - while others will have soups more reflective of other regions of the world. For example, Jews of Italian origin might enjoy hardy minestrone, descendants of Jews who fled Spain might enjoy a gazpacho in the summer or in the winter a hearty cozido, the Spanish version of cholent, Jews of German descent might, in addition to the traditional chicken soup, also love a potato soup, and so on. As far as cholent or Chamin or cozido goes we all know there are many different recipes and styles of cholent. (We will experience in in two weeks from now during the cholent cook-off contest). Most of the foods we eat on Shabbos have a reason attached to why we eat them. There is, however, only one food item that is directly associated with Mitzva: Challah.

The term ‘Challah’ comes from the Biblical commandment of “hafrashas challah”, which involves separating a piece of dough, and in Temple times was given to a Kohen to bake and eat himself. Now, during post-Temple times, a small piece of the challah dough is burned. We need to burn this little piece into nothingness, so that no non-Kohen will come to eat it. For the past two millennia the word challah referred only to this little piece of dough which was burned. It was only many centuries later that the loaves that were not burned took on the name “challah” amongst Ashkenazi Jews.

Rav Avraham David Wahrman, in his commentary Eishel Avraham on Shulchan Aruch in siman #260, writes that the reason we call the loaves ‘challah’ is to remind us of the mitzva to take off challah. It is noted in the sefer Hilchasa Rabsa L’Shabsa that challahs originally were called ‘burekas’ because when a woman took and separated a piece of ‘challah’ from the dough, she prayed for a blessing through the bread from an angel named ‘burekas’. The reality is that the separation of dough known as hafrashas challah is not exclusive to the dough that we make into the challah we have today. Rather, the mitzva to separate and take off a piece of dough applies to any dough one makes any day, any time, and any place. Nevertheless, the Rabbis encouraged women to specifically bake bread for the Shabbos meals thereby forcing one to fulfill a Mitzva in honor of Shabbos and the Shabbos table.

Although the mitzva of separating a piece of dough applies to both men and women, it nevertheless became a Mitzva associated with women more so than men. One might think the reason is because women do more cooking and baking so it is natural that they would do this mitzva. If I would say this was the reason, I would be attacked for stereotyping roles of women and being politically incorrect. Now, even though there are times that I don’t mind being politically incorrect, this is not a case as such. The Torah itself, with an explanation of Rashi, gives us insight as to how this all began and for whom it was begun. In Bereishis 25:67 the Torah states: “VaYivieha Yitzchok HaOhela Sarah Immo, Vayikach Es Rivka Vatehi Lo L’Isha Vaye’ehaveha, Vayinacheim Yitzchok Acharei Immo”. “And Yitzchok brought Rivka into his mother’s tent, and she became a wife to him, and Yitzchok was comforted after his mother”. Rashi quotes the famous Midrash Rabba 60:16 that miracles occurred in Sarah’s tent which dissipated when she died and returned when Rivka came along and assumed the role of matriarch for the Jewish people. The Midrash describes that as long as Sarah was alive a blessing was sent into her bread; when she died the blessing stopped. As Rivka entered Yitzchok’s life, the blessing in the bread returned. Although the focus in that context is the greatness of Rivka, we need to step back and realize that is was Sarah’s greatness to begin with which brought bracha/blessing to the dough.

Like many great women, roles of leadership and influence are camouflaged within the story, primarily to send a message of tznius/modesty, but that does not mean they didn’t influence or weren’t great in their own way. The greatness of Sarah Immeinu is highlighted in Bereishis 12:5 “Avram took his wife Sarai, his nephew Lot, and all their belongings, as well as the people they had gathered”. On the words ‘V’es Hanefesh Asher Asu B’Charan’ ‘the people they had made or gathered’ Rashi explains it was the souls they had made: Avram converting the men and Sarai converting the women to believe in the one God, Hashem. Sarah is equal to Avraham and an equal partner in their forming the Jewish people. Due to the greatness of Sarah, miraculous things happened to her such as her dough being a source of blessing. A declaration of how great Sarah was is found in the Midrash Rabbah Esther 7:11: Haman’s lottery first picked a day of the month and then he tried to select a month in which it should take place. He went through every month. Each one had a reason he couldn’t do it that month until he reached the last month of Adar. The month of Cheshvan was passed over in the merit of the great Tzadeikes Sarah Immeinu passing away. Perhaps this is another reason the Challah Bake takes place during this month of Cheshvan. All of our dough should be blessed in the merit of Sarah.

Ah Gut Shabbos Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky

Rabbi Bogopulsky’s book “Developing A Torah Personality” is available for purchase directly from him or Amazon

These last few weeks gave us close-up opportunities to witness the hand of God as well as the hand of man. The natural disasters of a severe 8.1 earthquake, the strongest to hit Mexico in a century, occurred while the hurricanes Harvey and Irma caused massive devastation which have affected the lives of millions of people in Houston, Texas and the state of Florida. Millions of Americans watched as violent winds and tumultuous rains tore apart the homes and lives of thousands of people. In the wake of these disasters, thousands of other people arrived, many travelling at their own expense from all parts of the United States, to help the hurricane victims, providing physical, emotional, spiritual and financial assistance. The outpouring of concern reached levels that saw Jews from San Diego fly to Houston, helping to bring some semblance of normalcy back into their lives. It was encouraging to see major Orthodox umbrella organizations come together, uniting and coordinating efforts on behalf of our fellow Jews. Unfortunately, at times it takes such awful disasters to bring out the best in us. Correspondingly, we occasionally lack perspective in the midst of such chaos and trauma, unwittingly saying things that may be misconstrued.

Such an occurrence took place when I happened to meet someone who lives in Florida but was in San Diego during the hurricane. In an attempt to offer him comfort during this tough time, I said, “there could be worse places to be than San Diego.” I meant only to say that he was fortunate to be in San Diego and not in the middle of a hurricane. As he passed me by he replied, “Who knows if I will even have a house to go back to; I may have lost everything.” Even though I was trying to extend comfort to him, my timing was off. Riding out the hurricane while being here in San Diego could not possibly assuage his fears. I thought about this for a few days and wanted to apologize for the incident. I waited to call at an appropriate time, when lo and behold I saw the person and seized the opportunity to ask if I could speak with him. I reviewed my feelings, pointing out how my good intentions went sour. Being the fine gentleman that he is, he immediately dismissed the entire situation and said that he did not take it that way at all. He described the extensive damage that his property sustained and related to me the stories of people who did not heed the warnings of the authorities. In most cases, reported deaths were the result of people who disregarded safety protocol and instructions. But as he got up to leave, he turned to me and said, “At least we are safe and alive.” Right then and there it hit me that during the time the hurricane was tearing across the area where his home was located, he also didn’t appreciate life because he was thinking of the monetary loss the devastation was causing. It was only later, when reality sank in, that he was able to understand and articulate that there is nothing more precious than life itself.

51. is underscored and highlighted when speaking of death. Typically, we lament more over a person who passes away in the prime of life or when very young. This is in contrast to speaking of someone who has passed away at a ripe old age. For an individual who lived a full life we tend to describe how the person led a full life, outlived their peers, and is no longer suffering. In the case of someone who really lived a long time we may be inclined to remark, “Well, no one lives forever,” giving recognition and acceptance that it was that person’s time to go. This does not make it any easier for the grieving family, but there is some consolation on the human and physical level. Not so the case when we view life from a spiritual perspective. Regardless of the quality of life a person may live, it is, nevertheless, life! Life is to be treasured. The importance of any kind of life is underscored in the Torah.

In the second of the two sedras we read from Parshas Vayeilech of Moshe’s impending death. The Torah states in Devarim 31:14: “Vayomer Hashem el Moshe: Hein Karvu Yamecha LaMus……”. “God said to Moshe, ‘The time is coming for you to die’….”. The Medrash Chayei Moshe brought forth in the Yalkut Shimon states how difficult it was for Moshe to part from this world. Moshe pleaded with Hashem that if he could not enter the land, could Hashem at least keep him in this world; could he at least not cause him to die. Moshe said: “Master of the universe, if I can’t go into Israel, at least let me be like the animals that just graze in the field, just eating grass and vegetation, drinking a little water, but have the chance to see the world. Hashem said to Moshe: ”Rav Lach!” - “Enough! Do not speak!” Moshe asks Hashem to just leave him in this world. He asks if he could just be like a bird that flies to the four corners of the world, picking up some food here and there and at night returns to its nest. He requests of Hashem, “Let my soul be like one of them - either an animal or a bird.” Again Hashem said “Enough!” We learn from Moshe how important life is in THIS world, even if only to remain as a bird or an animal. Every living creature serves a purpose in life.

Life in this world is so precious for every one of us - much more so than the life of an animal. The Vilna Gaon cried when he felt he was dying. The people around him asked, “Why are you crying? You lived such a perfect, complete life.” The Gaon answered, “In this world, with a small coin it is possible to buy and merit many mitzvos, such as tzitzis. This is equal to all the commandments.” We learn in Pirkei Avos 4:17:‘One moment of Torah and good deeds in this world is better than the entire world to come.’ Even though at the end of the Amidah on the High Holidays it states that we would have been better off had we not been created, but now that we are here we need to deal with life. Nevertheless, we should realize that when Hashem created us it was to fulfill the purpose and goal of man. We should keep in mind that this refers to every single human being. How much more so this applies to the creation of a Jew and to those who choose to be Jewish. We have a greater purpose in life to fulfill. We must fulfill the will of God.

As the year 5777 winds down, we contemplate our participation in this world and the life we’ve been living. Was this a year that lived up to the expectations I set for myself last Rosh Hashana? This is not an exercise in guilt looking back through the rearview mirror. Rather, take time to look ahead to a potential year of life focused on accomplishing anything we set our minds to attain. Don’t ask, “Did I take advantage of life, or did life take advantage of me?” Rather ask yourself, “How will I take advantage of the precious commodity called ‘life” How will I show the purpose of life and its meaning?” Life is precious and fragile; it is worth more than anything in the world. We should all be blessed with a year and a life full of Chaim, as Moshe lived his life to its maximum until one hundred twenty years. Amen!

Next week, the official summer vacation season comes to an end on Labor Day. Here in San Diego, and particularly at Beth Jacob, it has been a busy summer with the influx of tourists and extended family guests and friends. The Grill, our summer restaurant, was a perfect complement to the minyanim we offer at our Shul from morning to night. I, along others on our staff, have frequently remarked about how the tourists we’ve all been privileged to greet and make comfortable openly spoke of the warm welcome received and the positive experiences they had here at our Shul. Many underscored their remarks by adding that this isn’t the case at other Shul’s they’ve visited.

I can certainly attest to having visited and prayed at many different Shuls throughout my life. As a pulpit Rabbi, I have become acutely aware that I feel comfortable and made to feel like a member of minyanim in some places while in other places left alone, feeling like a stranger and outsider. When I visited my parents, I davened at a local shul in Arnona. I do not want to speak disparagingly about the members or about the Shul because it did offer me a place to daven that was close by. Nevertheless, over the few years that I’ve shown up only two men greeted and befriended me. I was always made to feel welcome but never made to feel comfortable. To the opposite extreme I found the most welcoming and warm minyan in the last place you would imagine! There is a little congregation at the Vasikin (early morning) minyan at the Kotel. There are many different minyanim at the Kotel throughout the day, including the very first minyan, known as Vasikin. This group is comprised of Chasidim/Chareidim. It is organized by a fellow who runs the minyan and coordinates the logistics, timing, and the welcome to any and all people. As I arrived each morning, he ran to get me and others who came with me chairs and a shtender (lectern). At the end of davening, they serve shnaps and cake if there is a yahrzeit or sponsor. The atmosphere is completely friendly and reminds me of our Shul. Its welcome and warmth connected me to home.

When a person travels for business or even pleasure there is a sense of nervousness and fear of being out of his/her element and familiar surroundings. In my mind, I thought I learned that a traveler is considered like a poor person. I could not find the source for it, but the rationale is consistent as a traveler doesn’t have his own place to sleep, a place to establish his own meals; he can feel desperate. I will take poetic license and leap from a traveler considered being poor and connect it to the Gemara in Nedarim 64ab “Arba’a Chashuvim K’Meis: Ani, Metzora, Suma, U’Mi She’ein Lo Banim”. There are four categories of individuals who are considered dead:one who is poor, is a leper, is blind, or is childless”. Since a poor person is considered dead, then the traveler who is considered poor would share the notion of being considered like dead. Therefore, helping a traveler is as if I saved his life. Now this may be a stretch of the imagination, but to a stranger and or a traveler it gives strength and security knowing they are welcome.

If you think that being hospitable is just a nice thing to do, you are wrong! In the context I provided, being hospitable and making people feel comfortable and secure is a Mitzva of returning their lost sense of being. The traveler is at a loss; perhaps he can’t articulate or describe the exact item that is lost but that sense returns when greeted and treated as a local rather than as a stranger. Today’s typical tourist with credit cards, cash and points may not feel truly lost. Nevertheless, there are many Jews who lose their spiritual way and land in San Diego, our fair city, where we welcome these ‘lost’ souls and slowly get returned by our community. This ‘Mitzva’ is indirectly described in the Torah. Its depth of meaning can be gleaned from one of the Mitzvos in this week’s Torah portion.

In this week’s Parsha Ki Tetzei the Torah states in Devaim 22:1 “Lo Tir’eh Es Shor Achicha Oh Es Seyo Nidachim V’Hisalamta Meihem, Hasheiv T’Sheeveim L’Achicha”. If you see your brother’s ox or sheep going astray, you must not ignore them. You must return them to your brother”. The Torah then expands in 22:3 to other lost items as well. “V’chein Taaseh LaChamoro, V’chein Taaseh L’Simlaso, V’Chein Taaseh L’Chol Aveidas Achicha Asher Tovad Mimenu Um’Tzasa, Lo Suchal L’Hisaleim”. “You must do the same to a donkey, an article of clothing, or anything else that your brother loses. You find it; you must not ignore it”. The Ohr HaChaim HaKadosh teaches that the ox of your brother refers to people who are compared to the animals but are nonetheless holy! We must return them to their brother, meaning to their homes, we must make them feel comfortable so that they can serve Hashem properly. This verse speaks to the righteous Jews who are commanded not to turn away from those who were pushed aside, but rather return and bring that sense of security and warmth of home back to them. The saintly Chofetz Chaim Rav Yisrael Meir Kagan in his sefer *Chomas Hadas writes that if the Torah went out of its way to show the value of animals in returning them when lost - which is of monetary value - how much more so the need to show mercy upon every Jewish soul who has strayed from the path of the Torah. *Rav Yosef Yoizel Horowitz writes in his sefer Madreigas Ha’Adam that the lost objects of your brother include the loss of his physical body to health issues, both physical and emotional. Finally, Rabbeinu Bachya teaches us that when the Torah says ‘do the same for your brother’s donkey’ which is even a non-kosher animal! It continues by emphasizing that we must return a lost garment that isn’t even a living creature, and concludes that this also applies to all lost items of your brother. Not only is it speaking of returning physical objects but also to doing anything to help a fellow Jew in need. That may be to remove any potential damage or to move your brother away from anything dangerous, including making him feel at ease and at home. This all is categorized under the Mitzva of V’Ahavta L’Rei’acha KaMocha: Love your neighbor as yourself.

For the past week, we have been witness to the destruction and devastation which hit Houston, Texas by Hurricane Harvey. An incredible number of different things have been lost and need to be ‘found’ - in this case to be replaced. This week we must fulfill at least three Mitzvos mentioned here. The Mitzvos of returning to our brethren that which they have lost, the negative precept of not turning away and the MItzva of showing love towards our fellow Jews. I am confident that if we send messages, e-mails, money and words of encouragement, the Almighty will see to it the need to speed up the process of everyone feeling at home once again.

Ah Gut Shabbos Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky

Rabbi Bogopulsky’s book “Developing A Torah Personality” is available for purchase directly from him or click here or on amazon.com

*Chomas Hadas - 1 Volume, published in 1905. On the importance of a man to study Torah, and encourage others to learn. as well as the need to create groups in every city wherein a man could acquire Torah.

*Rabbi Yoseif Yoizel Horowitz was the Alter of Novardhok (1848-1920). He was the founder of the Novardhok Mussar Yeshivah Network and author of Madreigas HaAdam

San Diego is a destination city for business and pleasure throughout the year. This is not only true for the general population, but for Jews alike. Although we have Jewish tourists all year long, there are a few specific times when there is a greater influx of particularly observant Jews. We are currently in the busiest and largest invasion of Orthodox and (what the non-Jewish world identifies as) ultra-orthodox Jews to our city. I can only speak of the vacationers who frequent Beth Jacob, but I would speculate that the other Shuls in town are experiencing the same numbers of visitors.

Jews of all religious stripes come to visit San Diego throughout the year, and I want to address the feelings of Jews from the entire spectrum, particularly from the ‘Chareidi” or right-wing camp. As a disclaimer, I - Chas V’shalom/Heaven forbid - am not being critical of any of our visitors from any area, I’m just bringing out an observation. Here is a sampling of some of the questions that I receive on a regular basis: After providing the time for Shacharis, the questioning visitors will typically then ask, “What time is the latest minyan?” When it comes to food, you know those handy places to eat outside of our homes, our visitors will ask, “Where is the pizza shop?” “The dairy restaurant?” ”How about the meat restaurant?” And, here’s the real topper: “Which gas station sells cholent on Thursday nights?” When it comes to education they ask, “Are there schools and yeshivos here?”” Is there a Kollel in San Diego”? The most general question is, “What do people do here?” (Translation: like for Jewish fun?) After I inform them in the negative on most of their initial questions, there is typically a follow-up that applies to all the inquiries, mainly… “How do you survive here?!”

There is another group of older tourists who have been to other vacation destinations and aren’t as sheltered as the group I previously described. They aren’t taken aback by what may one refer to as a small amount of “Jewish materialism” such as kosher eateries, bakeries, and such. What really amazes them is that people actually live here and raise observant families. This second group knows that there are Jews who reside outside of the large, concentrated cities where most Jews seem to live. Nevertheless, they are still surprised to see religious, genuinely observant Jews living here in San Diego! Personally, I don’t know what and or why they think this way, but they do. They also ask questions which are similar to those asked by the first group, only they don’t respond in disbelief, but with genuine surprise.

The short answer to these questioning and frequently flabbergasted tourists is we do not only survive, we thrive here! It is true we may not have many places to go out to eat or have round-the-clock minyanim with cholent available 24/7. But those amenities are not what make a Jewish community. I generalize about the San Diego Jewish community, but my focus of explanation relates specifically to the Beth Jacob family. We strive to be a fairly homogenous group of Jews who come together from different places. In a larger city, there would be a natural tendency for a group to break away when they attain a critical mass. Like a large family, the children tend to branch out, exploring different areas of interest. So, too, the Jews of our community treat each other as brothers and sisters despite differences in personal areas of expertise. Everyone teaches and speaks about tolerance, but there are those who not only preach but do. We may not be reaching out to the extended Jewish population, but everyone is welcomed warmly when they enter our house. It’s the challenges that make us bond together, strengthening each other spiritually; we depend upon each other as fellow Jews and children of Hashem.

My last remark to the guests and tourists is they should not be surprised with my answer, because this is exactly what Hashem recommends from us in this week’s parsha Parshas R’Ay. The Torah states in Devarim 14:1 “Banim Atem LaHashem Elokeichem, Lo Tisgodedu V’Lo Tasimu Karcha Bein Eineichem L’Meis.” “You are children of God your Lord. Do not cut or mutilate yourselves and do not make a bald patch in the middle of your head as a sign of mourning.” The simple understanding of ‘Lo Tisgodedu’ - do not cut yourself - clearly refers to the prohibition of excess mourning and acting as the non-Jews do when addressing death and mourning. Practically and metaphorically speaking in today’s day and age is the idea of not making yourself into groups that are different from each other. A real practical application is about one minyan which holds by different practices. That is the easy way to separate. For example, having separate minyanim for those who wear tefillin on chol hamoed versus those who do not. The greatest challenge is when Jews from different socio-economic backgrounds come together, or when the rich and poor attend the same functions all year round. The spiritual challenge is maintaining a community with different Hashkafos or philosophical outlooks on Judaism and focusing on different aspects of Jewish life. This is the true beauty of a smaller Jewish community, which, perhaps because of its size gets to be a unique example of how the Jewish people are intended to be. The opposite of ‘not making groups’ is respecting people who are different and keeping them together.

The Midrash on the words ‘do not band together’ teaches us that when we don’t stand apart from each other, the first part of the verse “We are children to Hashem” comes to light. The comparison comes from Korach. The Midrash states that we are not to group ourselves together and end up arguing and separating from each other. By doing so we will create a plague among us in the same way Korach separated himself from the rest of the Jewish people. He created a cut between himself and Moshe. The irony of the Midrash using the word ‘Korcha’ making a bald spot is that the name of Korach himself lies inside this word! Rebbi Shimon Ben Yochai takes these words to a higher level by looking at the next passuk. Here Hashem calls us ‘Banim’ – children. To Hashem His Banim, His children, are incredibly endearing. Immediately after this line, once we’ve reached this level, we are now referred to as an ‘Am Kadosh’ - a Holy people. Once we earned the relationship of being a child of Hashem, we then become holy, concluding with the declaration, “U’B’Cha Bachar Hashem” – “And to you did Hashem choose. The route for the Jewish people to acquire the title of the Chosen Nation can only come when we live respectfully together, side by side, despite all our differences. Here at Beth Jacob we strive to become the Chosen by working together to accept each other for who we are. This does not mean everyone must agree with everyone else; we must respect and honor our differences, focusing on building a Torah-observant community. This is our core belief. Our Beth Jacob community should see itself as a role model for other smaller Jewish communities and ultimately for the larger communities as well. We know we will have succeeded when the tourists and visitors no longer see us as hardy pioneers somehow living in the wilderness without the trappings larger communities view as essential but rather see our community as the gold standard, living up to commitment of V’Ahavta L’Rieacha Kamocha.

As Jews around the world began the transition from Tish’a B’Av to Shabbos Nachamu, the Shabbos of consolation, I began to think about what ‘grade’ or score God gave us regarding this most recent day of mourning. What, I wondered, are the metrics that Hashem uses to determine whether we convinced Him that we are truly worthy of return, worthy of bringing about the salvation? Did we just cry about the destruction of Jewry throughout the centuries around the world? Was our focus deeply intent enough on praying for the Beis HaMikdash to be rebuilt or crying with the Teshuva/repentance that we will try harder to watch how we speak? I think they are all valid points that Hashem uses to calculate our score, but I would like to add one more: Did we focus with intensity; did we truly crave for our return to Eretz Yisrael? Putting aside the modern-day word of ‘Zionism’ as a measure, do we continue to work on our Ahavas Eretz Yisrael, our true love of the land? I’m not sure if I would qualify to be a Zionist because as of now I don’t live in Israel. Nevertheless, I am proud to believe and declare with a full heart that Eretz Yisrael is the land that all Jews should aspire to live in. I believe fervently that ultimately, in the time of Moshiach, Eretz Yisroel – our land of Israel - will be the central place for Jews to live.

A day or two before Tisha B’Av I was shocked and taken aback reading an article from a well-known, outspoken Jew expressing his opinion that Jewish communities should be strengthened. I try not to criticize people in a forum like this, and I also want to be careful in my critique of his message. He clearly writes how Israel is central to the Jewish people, but on the other hand Europe should not become desolate of Jews. He writes to the contrary how Jews should be proud of their Judaism and be able to freely express their Jewish identity publicly. The following is a direct quote from the author: “I count the State of Israel as the great love of my life and I have taken immense pride seeing my children serve in its military. Israel is the eternal homeland of the Jewish People. But Jews also have a universal mission. It warms my heart to see the continued success of Polish Chief Rabbi Michael Shudrich, rebuilding Jewish life where six million Jews were murdered, and I was moved to my core to see the enormous new synagogue in Munich where 80 years ago Hitler came to power, run by Rabbi Shmuel Brodman. No reader of this column should wish to see Europe become a continent empty of Jews”.

I understand the need for Jewish outreach, positively affecting our fellow Jews who live in the diaspora – as well as in Eretz Yisroel. I understand and accept that it’s extremely important for us to have a strong presence within communities throughout the free world, to build our educational and religious infrastructure. I don’t, however, see the need to rebuild communities which were the scene of horrific destruction, to “rebuild Jewish life where six million” of our people were brutally exterminated. The Navi Yeshayahu spoke about the Jews being an ‘Or Lagola’ by living a good and upright life in the land of Israel - showing the world how a people – a unified nation - in our land are supposed to act. Yes, we should set the example by living lives of chessed, emunah (belief), and positive contribution – wherever we reside, but the concept of Light unto the Nations does not mean showing the nations of the world how to live through viewing the way Jews happen to live among gentiles in the diaspora. It is our job to give that light to the world simply because that is who we are supposed to be and displaying it from with our land Eretz Yisrael.

I was particularly disturbed to read this article at the same time we were preparing ourselves for Tisha B’Av - the fast day commemorating the exile from the land in which we ought to want to live. Perhaps the timing of this week’s parsha VaEschanan in proximity to this calamity comes to remind us of the land we are not only supposed to want but a land to which we are intimately connected; a land which in we are entitled to live and flourish.

In this week’s Parsha VaEschanan the Torah states in Devarim 4:1: “V’Ata Yisrael Shma El HaChukim V’El HaMishpatim Asher Anochi Melamed Eschem LaAsos, L’Maan Tichyu Uvasem Virishtem Es HaAretz, Asher Hashem Elokei Avoseichem Nosein Lachem” - “Now, Israel, listen to the rules and laws that I am teaching you to do, so that you will remain alive and come to occupy and inherit the land that God, Lord of your fathers, is giving you.” Rav Moshe Lotar explains that there is only one way the Jews would be able to enter into the land and to hold on to it for the length of days. The method is to listen and to adhere to our laws. The verse specifically uses the word ‘now’ indicating to us that it is only now after Moshe’s prayers did not help him, that he was punished because he sinned by hitting the rock instead of speaking to it. Because Moshe sinned by hitting the rock rather than speaking to it, Moshe lost the Zchus - merit to enter the land, and, as a byproduct, extend the days of his life.

The second half of the passuk is predicated on the first half: “In order to live and come to inherit the land and to hold onto it, one needs to listen to the laws and statutes that I teach you here today.” There are many references to the lack of holiness in the exile and the increased amount of impurity outside Eretz Yisrael. We know that living in Eretz Yisrael gives us the opportunity to fulfill more of the mitzvos than our brethren can fulfill outside the land. The Midrash HaGadol points out regarding this verse the fact that God is teaching us. The Midrash asks: “What is God teaching?” while not taken literally, it nevertheless teaches us that whoever is involved, whoever toils in Torah, will merit for himself a share in the World to Come. With the learning of the Torah we will merit the inheritance and therefore the occupation of our land.

The goal, the ultimate purpose of the Jewish people is to learn Torah, to observe and fulfill the Mitzvos. This alone will gain us access to Eretz Yisroel, permitting us to fulfill more mitzvos. Once we are successful at that, we can then be Or Lagoyim - a light unto the nations from our home land, not by living amongst the gentiles. The Ohr HaChaim HaKadosh explains this verse from the viewpoint of Moshe warning us, the Jewish People, to listen to what Hashem tells us to do, unlike Moshe himself who sinned by hitting the rock. As a result, Moshe was not permitted entrance into Eretz Yisrael. Moshe encouraged and warned the Jews not to sin and suffer his fate. On the contrary Moshe did everything in his power to arrange Klal Yisrael to enter, settle and inherit the land that was promised to our forefathers, Avraham, Yitzchok and Yaakov. Moshe tried to get them into Eretz Yisrael as quickly as possible and to settle the land for he knew this was our homeland and we would flourish in our land rather than flounder in the diaspora.

If we can’t make Aliyah right now, let us appreciate the need to settle in Eretz Yisrael. It is our mission, of course, to build up our local communities, but it should also be our yearning and hope to support and to love Eretz Yisrael so that one day we will be privileged to settle the land of our inheritance.

Ah Gut Shabbos       Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky

Rabbi Bogopulsky’s book “Developing A Torah Personality” is available for purchase directly from him or Amazon

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=bogopulsky or

bit.ly/torahwisdom

When I was in Yeshiva, I had a car which was nice-looking on the outside but was very temperamental on the inside. Each day, before turning on the ignition, I spoke gently to the car and said, “Please start, pretty please start,” and when it actually did decide to start, I didn’t say Baruch Hashem but rather “Attaboy,” giving some encouragement as if it were my horse. There are many forms of communication used by humans, animals, and perhaps even other living life forms. There is one type of communication, however, that brings a human being closer to Godliness - the ability to speak. Typically, we humans use our gift of speech to communicate with each other. There are times, however, when a person is overheard speaking to himself or even to an inanimate object.

It wasn’t all that long ago those hands-free devices, particularly headsets, came on the scene. When these devices first came out, it was both comical and amazing to see someone walking down the street or wandering through the grocery aisles apparently talking to himself. Frequently, we had to tell ourselves that the person wasn’t actually talking to himself; he was talking to someone on his cell phone. We have now grown accustomed to this imagery, but there are still situations where I will ask my wife, “What did you say?” I thought that my - hearing was beginning to go, but my wife typically replies, “Nothing. I am talking to myself.” At least in that situation it it’s easy to assume she is talking to me. There is another phenomenon that I notice many of us doing: many of us have a tendency to talk to ‘things’.

Take my computer, for example. It is aging, and every time I turn it on I need to give it encouragement pep talk. My computer usually cooperates when I encourage it by saying, “Come on! Turn on. You can do it. Just a little more effort.” After reading a newspaper, I find myself saying, “Goodbye paper,” as in I’m done with you and never want or need to see you again. I even caught someone kissing his smartphone, telling it that it is great. This acceptance of our automated devices which are programmed to “listen” to our questions and return instantaneous responses has now morphed into practically having a conversation with an app. There are also frustrating moments when inanimate objects get in our way or don’t permit us to do things we really need to do. When our phones, tablets, or laptops refuse to cooperate, we tend to threaten the offending device exclaiming, “I’m going to kill you!” (referring of course, to the computer). Somehow, we have become comfortable talking to these inanimate machines as if they were living creatures. What are the ramifications of our speech when we speak to ourselves out loud or express our feelings of happiness or frustration to a machine? The fine line of distinction lies in the intent of our words. Would we really smash a non-functioning computer? Would the computer care? Of course not! On the other hand, In Jewish law and thought, all speech – open or spoken only to ourselves – must be taken seriously. A person is held accountable for his or her words and statements. When faced with a grave illness or assumed certain death a person may emotionally say, “God was good to me, so I’m going to give such and such an amount of tzdakkah,” but then miraculously and thankfully that person recovers. Is that individual obligated to still give that tzdakkah? Absolutely. A commitment was made! The Talmud has many discussions regarding changing a statement or making declarations regarding an individual preparing to die who then recovers. Which statement is to be believed and upheld? These and many other forms of ambiguous speech are carefully examined to determine the impact of a person’s speech. One such ambiguous form of speech comes in the form of a “Neder” - a vow or promise. A full tractate of the Talmud, Mesechta Nedarim, is dedicated to this usage of speech and what the implications and ramifications are. One of the sources in the Torah on vows and pledges is found in the first of the two parshios we read this week.

In this week’s parshios of Matos /Masei, the Torah opens with the laws of vows. The Torah states in Bamidbar 30:3: “Ish Ki Yidor Neder LaHashem, O Hishava Shvua Lesor Isar Al Nofsho Lo Yacheil Dvaro, K’Chol HaYotzei MiPiv Yaaseh”: “If a man vows to God, or makes an oath which obligates himself, he must not break his word. He must do all that he expressed verbally.” Immediately, we take note of the negative ‘Do not break a word,’ followed by a positive ‘Do all that was expressed.’ There is a Mitzvas Asei (positive command) and a Lo SaAsei (negative command) associated with the same idea. Rav Yoel Schwartz, in his sefer Davar B’Ito, explains the mitzva to fulfill vows and oaths as a very serious matter. The world shook when God said, “Do not take my name in vain.” Words are to be taken seriously. Nevertheless, there are times when a person has regret for making a vow or just saying he will do such and such. Even though there is recourse that if he realizes later on that this was not what he wanted he can go to one sage or three ordinary individuals to annul the statement, vow, promise or custom that he was doing. However, someone who fulfills his word and does not annul it is praised.

There is a story about Rebbi Yehoshua Ben Levi related in gemara Kesuvos 77b. When R. Yehoshua ben Levi was about to die, the Satan (angel of death) was told to accede to his desires. The Satan appeared to him. R. Yehoshua ben Levi asked to see where his place will be in Gan Eden. The Satan consented. R. Yehoshua ben Levi asked for the Satan's knife, lest it scare him on the way; he gave it to him. When they got there, the Satan lifted him up and showed him his place in Gan Eden. R. Yehoshua ben Levi jumped to the other side, held onto his garment, and swore that he would not leave. God said, “If he ever annulled an oath, he will go back to the world. If not, not, he will stay in Gan Eiden. (He had, in fact, never annulled a vow.) At that point, the Satan asked him to return his knife. R. Yehoshua ben Levi refused. A voice from Heaven declared he must return it for it is needed for the world. (R. Yehoshua ben Levi returned it.)

Another case in point of how critical it is to follow through on our words is in Bava Metzia 49a. Rav Kahana received partial payment for flax and then the price went up. Rav said you must give flax according to the money you received. The agreement to sell the rest is mere words. One who retracts is not considered unfaithful. Rav says one who retracts from an oral agreement is not considered unfaithful; while Reb Yochanan says he is considered unfaithful.

The highest level of keeping one’s word is found in Makkos 24a, whereby a person should live up to the character of Rav Safra. Rav Safra spoke the truth from his heart. He once had an object for sale. While he was reciting the Shema, a buyer offered a price that Rav Safra found acceptable. However, the buyer thought that Rav Safra rejected the offer, because he received no answer from Rav Safra. In truth, however, Rav Safra could not answer because he was in the middle of Keri'as Shema. The buyer increased the offer. After he completed his prayers, Rav Safra refused the buyer's second offer and insisted upon accepting the first offer, which he had already accepted in his mind.

The Sfas Emes, Reb Yehudah Aryeh Leib Alter, explains the words “Do not desecrate your word” as follows: “Whoever does not desecrate his word, then everything that comes out of his mouth he will do. Hashem then listens and hears his prayers on the level of a Tzadik who declares and God fulfills.

If we keep to our word and back up what we say, Hashem will listen and fulfill our words. If we don’t desecrate our words, if we stand by our words, Hashem will lift us up and carry our words and commitment to fruition. Many of us say we are going to do something. It is our obligation to follow through with our commitment through even though it may be difficult to do so. If we put forth the effort, Hashem will make it all work out for us.

Ah Gut Shabbos

Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky

         This Dvar Torah should merit a Refuah Shelima             for Gershon Avraham Ben Devorah Bryna

In previous messages I’ve written about the significance of numbers within Jewish lore. Whether mystical or practical, certain numbers come up time and time again. Specific numbers often recur in Torah literature or sometimes connect to events and people. Without going into a discussion of the ‘other’ numbers, I would like to focus on the number three. Visually, the number three is unique; folded down, it becomes the shape of zero, when it’s flipped it over, and it remains a three. The third point is amongst the 10 Most Popular Digits in The New Prime, Number #3 ranked at the top – placing first: Three — 1,745,603 occurrences! It’s clear that the number three is very popular*.

We know in Jewish law that the number three, or the performance of doing something three times, creates a chazaka - a strength to the matter. But besides the chazaka element, we come across three partners involved in different areas of life: tzedakah, a baby and lashon hora. When an individual comes to collect on behalf of an organization, a Torah institution, or even for an individual or family, there are three people affected by the act: the solicitor, the giver and the recipients of the gift. We are taught that there are three partners in creating a child: the mother, the father, and God. Some participation is required from all three to be successful. The third example is when lashon hora is spoken, there are three people being afflicted: the speaker, the listener, and the person about whom the bad words were spoken. It is interesting to note that in all three instances if one of the three is missing, it will hamper that which is desired. Particularly with regard to lashon hora, if the listener refuses to hear it, the speaker will stop talking about the person because he has no audience to tell it to.

338903. coming Tuesday is the fast of the seventeenth of Tammuz, beginning the “Three Weeks”. It is known as the weeks of trouble between the day the walls of Yerushalayim were breached leading up to Tish’a B’Av: the day both Batei Mikdashim Temples were destroyed. We know that on the ninth of Av both the first and the second Temples were destroyed, but the walls Jerusalem were breached on the 17^th of Tammuz only during the time preceding the destruction of the second Temple. During the first Temple the walls were breached on the 9^th of Tammuz. Nevertheless, the Rabbis saw fit to only mourn the breaching of the walls of Yerushalayim before the destruction of the second Temple, combining both tragedies into one day. There could be many reasons offered, but at the end this decision kept it to the number three, as in the three weeks.

In this week’s parsha there are two interrelated stories that share something happening three times. Balak, king of Moav, summons Bilaam, the non-Jewish prophet, to curse the Jewish people. (Please read the portion if you aren’t familiar with the story). As Bilaam travels to Moav to try to fulfill the request of Balak, his famous donkey stops on the path because it sees an angel of God in the middle of the road. The donkey tries to go around the angel but pinches Bilaam’s legs against the brush. As it states in Bamidbar 22:28 “Vayiftach Hashem Es Pi Ha’Ason, Vatomer L’Bilaam Meh Asisi L’cha Ki Hikisani Zeh Shalosh Regalim”. To set the donkey straight, Bilaam strikes his donkey none other than (you guessed it) three times, at which time the donkey speaks, questioning his master why he was hitting him these three ‘Regalim’ like legs or walking three times. Finally, upon Bilaam’s arrival, he and Balak set out to curse the Jews. Seven altars were erected and sacrifices were offered. Bilaam wandered off meditating and then tried to curse the Jewish people. Fortunately, just as Hashem had told Bilaam when he acquiesced to his request to go, Hashem said, “You may only say the things I tell you to say.” Hence, a blessing and not a curse emerged from Bilaam’s lips. This experiment was attempted (once again) three times, and each time the results were the same if not greater and better for Am Yisrael. As bad as the curses were meant to be, the Brachos that were given were great in their own way. As it states in Bamidbar 24:10: “Vayichar Af Balak El Bilaam Vayispoke Es Kapav, Vayomer Balak El Bilaam Lakov Oiyvai Krasicha V’Hineh Berachta Bareich Zeh Shalosh P’amim”. “Furious at Bilaam, Balak struck his hands together stating, ‘I brought you to curse my enemies, but you blessed them these three times.”

Even though both references mention three times, one pertaining to hitting the donkey and the other regarding Bilaam blessing the Jews three times, the ‘re’ is a slight nuance in the Hebrew. The first time it uses the ‘regalim’ and the second ‘p’amim’. Both are loosely translated as times, but Rashi points out the specific and intentional wording by the hitting. Rashi’s famous comment on the word ‘regalim’ is a hint that the donkey said to Bilaam “the nation that will eventually perform the mitzva of Aliyah L’Regel and celebrate the festivals three times a year cannot be harmed by you trying to curse them.” The Sifsei Chachamim asks, ‘why was this mitzva chosen to defend the Jews more so than any other Mitzva?” He answers that this Mitzva fits and is a little more unique than other mitzvos. Later in Devarim at the end of parshas R’ay, the Torah states in 16:16: “Three times a year all your males shall thus be seen in the presence of God your Lord in the place that He will choose.” The passuk states that the men will be seen by Hashem. It is not only because the Jews are going to celebrate and fulfill the mitzvos of the Shalosh Regalim of Pesach, Sukkos, and Shavuos. It is that Hashem will have the opportunity to see His children visiting him, and therefore the donkey exclaims, “How can your curses work on a people that God wants to see!” It will be impossible to annihilate and destroy the Jews because Hashem wants and needs us to be around. Therefore, this hint was offered as the connector between hitting the donkey three times and Bilaam blessing the Jews three times.

13031. three participating elements are represented in the Parsha’s cases. Regarding Bilaam, it his him, his donkey, and the desire to curse the Jews. The second scenario is Bilaam, Balak and the desire to curse the Jews. The significance of three is both the odd number and the third part which sways the vote to either side. Let us find the opportunity to be the positive third side – the influence for something positive and the nay say when we voice our opposition to something that is wrong. If we have Hashem on our side, then the other sides will follow suit.

Ah Gut Shabbos

Rabbi Avraham Bogopulsky

* There's a new prime number on the block and everyone is itching to get to know it. Even though the text file came in at a whopping 25 megabytes, the number of instances was counted in the newest identified Prime. Coming in at a mighty 17,425,170 digits, it wasn't an easy task. Still, the most popular number will surprise you. [As for methodology, numbers were loaded into 10 different browser tabs, and then Control+F'd each digit to get a count of how many times it occurred.]